How do you keep the momentum going? I vacillate so much on my work in progress and it doesn't take much to trigger the double-headed dragon of Self-Doubt and Procrastination into action.

So what triggered this week's reappearance of the debilitating dragon?

I read one sentence in The Sydney Morning Herald with a book title to be released in a few months that sounded oddly familiar, oddly like 'Beyond Happily Ever After.'  But the first word was missing and there was a question mark at the end. So I googled it with the author's name and came upon the order form. On the third page of the order form, the title was sitting right next to Erica Hayes' Shadowglass (of which I won an ARC on Twitter from Pan Macmillan during the week -woohoo!) and the concept of this other book also sounds very similar to mine: what happens to the girl after she marries her handsome prince. Though it does not appear to use actual fairytale characters as I have.

But it gave me reason to pause.

Then Jenny Crusie blogged about herself and Krissie and Lani making collages of their next collaboration which will feature Cinderella (oh-oh!), Rapunzel and Red Riding Hood.  Sounds fabulous and their collages are superb.

But then my dragon fully came to life and kept bellowing flames at me 'I'm not worthy!'  And just to prove it, I did minimal editing last week.

Last night, I came across another blog post from by Mary Danielson: "Your Book is Different".  Mary had a similar experience very recently and ended up listing a number of reasons why  her book is different to the one that had been listed in the publishing deals.

So I will do the same:

Beyond Happily Ever After is different to the one to be released in May, and the collaboration because:

1.  it is a unique twist of fairytale that combines Cinderella and Snow White's stories as they have married princes who are cousins.
2. it combines old world fairy tale aspects along with modern life and looks at what it may be like to be a princess today
3. started life as a short story which was published in <a href="http://www.wetink.com" target="_blank">Wet Ink</a> magazine - have already acquired a fanbase, who are waiting for the rest of Cindy's story
4. I have a unique voice
5. I have received excellent and very encouraging feedback in contests
6. I loved writing this manuscript and people are going to love reading the book (though I know some of its themes are going to mean it's not everybody's cup of tea)\
7. there are other fairytale re-imaginings already published - one or two, more will help rather than hinder others getting published
8. my manuscript WILL be out on submission by the time this other book comes out in May
9. My imagination is very very twisted
10. Twisted fairytales may become the new vampires
    

I feel better already. I bought a Disney scrapbook with Cinderella on the front and Snow White on the back to collage the story. (plan to do the collage in chronological order which is not how the story appears - mmm, that may be another point of difference) and I have been making red marks on printouts of the pages.

But thinking about this, authors who write vampire stories must come across this all the time. Someone beating them to the punch with a similar idea. And they keep writing.

I still have total faith in my retelling of Cinderella. Besides, the story is complete and I only have about 30 pages left to edit. It would be very silly to give up now just because someone else is publishing something similar.

So it's back to caging the dragons, ignoring the self-doubt and declaring myself worthy and UNIQUE. And back to editing.  I WILL  finish editing this story by the end of February! MY Cinderella has a ball to go to.

When I started writing seriously again, I never claimed to be writing romance.  I said I was writing relationship stories and when I started reading chick lit, the genre completely clicked with me.  In chick lit, there were heroines I could relate to, going through real-life issues, and trying to find their place in the world. Not necessarily trying to land a man, though that could be part of it, but going through a journey of self-discovery through career, friends etc.

My writing voice has a very distinctive chick lit edge. My heroines have flaws, are not always self-assured but often have a wicked sense of humour. For many stories, the main character discovered who she was through creativity – whether it was photography, art, music.  The creativity was a major part of her journey to self-awareness.  But at the same time, she would always end up with a guy at the end. It wasn’t always clear whether the guy would be Mr Right – perhaps he was just ‘Mr Right-for-Now’ and the ‘happily ever after’ was a ‘happy for now’ ending.

A few years ago, I joined Romance Writers of Australia – I don’t write conventional romance, but  it is the closest genre to what I do write, and I’ve found a wonderful community of writers in RWAus.

But I’m facing up to the fact that I am never going to write conventional romance – the one man/one woman stories which are almost solely about striving for a romantic relationship. I could never write category romance – the focus is too narrow – when I love lots of characters, parallel or contrasting sub-plots, and the general interference of reality. I shudder at the thought of  secret babies and so far not one of my characters has unintentionally fallen pregnant.  But I must admit, I do love the ‘pretend relationship’ trope, and have even used it in my real life, and like the contrast: ‘the secret relationship’ (and admit I’ve also done that in my real life.)

For a while I tried to convince myself that I was writing romance – after all, the girl always got the guy in the end. Even if I hadn’t intended to end it that way. But after entering romance competitions for several years, and polarising my judges on more than one occasion, I’ve decided that my writing is too far outside the ‘romance’ box for the conventional romance readers/judges to get it.

Reality Check was given a severe slap on the wrist by all three judges because the 29 y.o hero slept with the 19 y.o heroine on the first date.  And yet without  that as part of the set-up, what would it matter if they then sign a contract that forbids them from sleeping with each other?  And hello, first dates sometimes do end up in bed together on the first date in real life.

I’ve been told that polarising judges is a sign of a fresh voice, but while I’m buoyed by the comments from the higher-scoring judges, and find some value in the constructive feedback of the lower-scoring judges (and find it very bizarre that lower-scoring judges can give some fantastic comments and then mark you with a low score), I’m done with contests.  I don’t want to pay money out to have judges who don’t get my writing. As Jenny Crusie would say, ‘not my readers’.

Instead, I’m concentrating on making my writing the best it can be, telling the stories I want to tell (and not being boxed by a convention) and improving my writing craft.  I’ll be enrolling in online courses, applying what I learn to my works in progress and submitting to agents.

I’ll no longer be entering competitions that are defined by genre, and instead will step into the bigger competition – the real world of publishing. Wish me luck!

(this post transferred from Write on Track blog)

It's January 31 which brings me to the end of Margie Lawson's fabulous Defeating Self-Defeating Behaviors online course.

So did I slay my dragons?

Yes and no.

You see these are the kind of dragons that resurrect themselves.  SELF-DOUBT can make a new appearance when I'm faced with a new opportunity, a request, an offer of a critique.  And then his other head PROCRASTINATION makes another appearance offering solace.

For now, these dragons are caged in the corner, and I've hung a large sign at the front that says "DO NOT FEED THE DRAGONS"

So when these dragons appear in my life, I will laugh at them, I will not listen them, I will jump in do what I need to do, armed with my Winner List and my Superstar List.  They may breath fire, but they are big and bulky and I can outrun them, as long as I keep acting on my goals and moving forward.

I've learned so much during the last four weeks and I have Margie to thank, and my fabulous change coach Lesley to thank, along with a bunch of amazing classmates who were willing to battle their dragons and share their insights.

My fellow We Love YA blogster, Natalie Hatch, made me a hula hoop in November last year. Putting Margie's DUH theory into practice, hula-hooping is now a daily part of my life and I can proudly say I can hula hoop, though no tricks yet. But at the beginning of the month, I could barely keep the hoop spinning, so the tricks will come soon.

I cannot recommend Margie's course highly enough. Although the course is offered online only once a year, you can visit her website and buy the lecture pack. Better still, buddy up with a friend to be your change coach, and do the course together.

Margie also offers some fantastic courses in editing. The next course is Empowering Characters' Emotions held online in March through PASIC, and Nat and I have already enrolled.  Take that, you Self-Doubt/Procrastination dragon.   Ooh, I just stabbed him in the belly. He's not looking too happy at the moment. Mastering the craft aspect of writing (and editing) may make him redundant. He might have to find someone else to hassle.

I just remembered: when I turned 27, I had a 7 year old birthday party and we played kids games all afternoon. My mum made me a dragon cake - he was gorgeous.

But this was only a year or two before  I did a life-changing self-development course, met my partner, lost my mum and decided to pursue writing seriously. Perhaps the cake was a symbol of the dragons I was going to have to face.But then again, that cake got cut up and eaten and he was delicious. Maybe that's how I need to treat all my dragons from now on.

(turns to look at cage).  Mmm, SELF-DOUBT dragon, I'm hoping you taste like chocolate.

So now I’ve reviewed and dissected 2009, it’s time to set some goals for 2010.

DAILY
Do something writerly every day. Write new words, rewrite old words, edit, tinker, synopsise, plan, plot, outline, query, collage, give my characters the 3rd degree – as long as it’s writing related.

WEEKLY
Okay, so I’m going to commit myself to making a mess once a week and creating a collage poem.  Not committing to cleaning up the mess.
Blog at least weekly here at Write on Track, and on Sundays at We Love YA and one day each week at the Romance Writers of Australia blog.

PROJECT GOALS

Beyond Happily Ever After to be edited, polished and submitted to agents until Cindy finds a home.

Diary of the Future to be edited, polished and submitted until it finds a home (agents and publishers)

Making the Cut to be submitted to publishers.

Collage Poetry Anthology with Jen Gordon to be produced by end of November.

And another of my current zero drafts (yet to be determined) to be hacked and slashed and rewritten.

50ks in 30 days in June is penciled in, but I’m not firmly committed at this point to write another 50ks of a new project – let’s see how the first five months pan out first.

Nanowrimo – again a tentative maybe I will and maybe I won’t.
I know I can write, and I know I can write fast.  I don’t necessarily need the 50ks and Nano challenge to prove that to myself anymore. But I do spend time focusing on editing and rewriting and producing the best manuscripts I can.

I would like to finish the 12 Step Fairy Program at some point.

I’m very fond of Felicity, my fairy-dust snorting grandmother. Maybe I can fit it in this year.

Other writer events:
To get myself in the right frame of mind for 2010, I’m beginning the year with another Margie Lawson course:  Defeating your Self-Defeating Behaviour. Yes, I have a few dragons to slay and I learned a lot from the last Margie course that I did. I’m enrolled. Bring it on – January 4th.

I will attend another Writers Retreat with the Nambucca Valley Writers Group in May. This year we are going to a different venue, and trying a different approach. Instead of presenting workshops to each other, we will be each working on whatever creative project takes our fancy at the time.

I will attend Byron Bay Writers Festival again. (yes, it’s a ritual).

And this year, I will attend the Romance Writers of Australia conference in Sydney. That will mean I can catch up with all my writer friends, my Sydney family and a few Sydney friends.

My writing mantra for 2009  WRITE EDIT SUBMIT has been rewritten for the new decade as I’ve done enough new writing just for the moment.
So 2010 will be the year that I  REWRITE EDIT SUBMIT. Ad Infinitum.

As usual, it’s all about writing. I’m still trying to stay Write on Track!

As promised, here are the sunrise photos from January 1, 2000.

I bet she wasn’t watching any sunrise this morning.  And you know what, neither was I!

What are you writing goals for 2010?

Where did the last decade go? It spun by faster than I could imagine – it seems like yesterday I was dancing on the banks of the Macleay River dressed as a Millenium bug, and the next morning the first sunrise of the millenium was glorious…I’ll bring you a photo tomorrow (need to scan it first!)

So it’s time to look at my 2009 goals and what I actually achieved. Perhaps I bit off much more than I could chew.

DAILY GOAL

Do something to further my writing every day (write, edit, critique, submit).

Achieved: Most days, though I know there were some where I just got sucked way into the internet or into the couch and did not contribute to my writing. But the first half of 2009, I was on track with this, and regular writing appointments with Deanna Carlyle went a long way to honouring this goal.

WEEKLY GOAL

Create a new collage poem a week.

Whoops. I created a few during my Writers Group retreat, but for the most part I didn’t do much collage. I made an attempt at creating some erotic collage and just did not have the right words – the Cleo and Cosmo mags let me down with titles that were more titillating than sensual.  And somehow, I just didn’t want to do a collage poem about blow jobs, which seems to be a fixation of these magazines.

Here’s a couple I did during the retreat:

Face it: collage is messy. You need time to get into that head space and into the mess. And time to clean it all up again. But as the stockpile of old magazines grows and grows, I realise I have to cut up the useful words to make some storage.  I did make a couple of attempts to make a black out poem as per Austin Kleon, but I found that I couldn’t see the trees for the forest.

So the anthology goal (in co-collageship with Jen Gordon) will be reset for 2010 and I will just have to get my head around the mess-making.

(And Jen has left us to do a design course in Sydney in 2010 – yay Jen!)

MONTHLY GOAL

One short story per month.

I completely forgot about this one (apologies to Karina). I guess that’s what happens when you leave your goals on your blog, and don’t print them out and stick them in your diary so that they’re in your face every day. (I will print out my 2010 goals!)

So there were no short stories this year.

YEARLY GOAL

WRITE EDIT SUBMIT  and beat writing 200, 078 words.

Well – I wrote, I edited and I submitted to contests.

Let me work out how much I wrote. I know it won’t be more than the figure above.

115, 193 words written in 2009. That does not count rewriting. I find that difficult to keep track of.

That’s okay. Because I wanted to focus on editing and submitting in 2009.

So my project goals for 2009 were:

1 Finish writing the first draft of Reality Check   – completed. Yay!


2. Complete edit of Making the Cut.  Submit until it finds a home.  - completed. Now with CP.


3. Complete edit of Diary of the Future. Submit until it finds a home.  - not touched.


4.  Complete edit of Beyond Happily Ever After. Submit until it finds a home. - halfway through.


5. Write 50ks in 30 days in June with my RWA pals. – wrote 37,168 words.


6. Write 50ks during Nanowrimo in November. – wrote 21,146 words

Beyond Happily Ever After went into 3 competitions: The Stiletto, The STALI and The Emerald.

Reality Check was entered into The STALI.
So what else happened in 2009?

The annual and warmly anticipated Nambucca Valley Writers Group retreat to Smokey Cape Lighthouse:

I even gave a workshop on Writing Sex Scenes.  Scary stuff!

I did Margie Lawson’s Writing Body Language online course.  Fabulous!

And I submitted Beyond Happily Ever After to the Hachette Qld Writer’s Centre Manuscript Development Program.


I didn’t attend the Romance Writers of Australia conference in Brisbane. Instead I joined my sisters in crime, Sandie Hudson and Rhian Cahill in running the Clayton’s Conference, and did we have a ball!  – with lots of competitions, chat sessions, Q&A’s and tutorials.  It was full on, and I was possibly more exhausted than if I’d attended the real life conference.  Have you even tried to MC an online an awards ceremony, repost prize winners from the real ceremony and update a blog simultaneously? Then you haven’t lived.

After spending the year as part of the web team for Romance Writers of Australia, I put my hand up to join the Executive Committee.  So I’m now the Social Media Manager which includes looking after our email loop, Twitter and be the blogmistress of the RWA blog, and look for more opportunities to expand RWA’s social media universe with my great team.

Plus I joined the We Love YA blog team set up by my fabulous critique partner, Kiki , Natalie Hatch, Amanda Ashby, Sara Hantz and Vanessa Barneveld. During the year we added Steph Bowe and Ellie Royce to our team.


And this is why I have been absent so much from this blog.  It all takes time. Plus I had to apply for the position I was working in on a temporary basis and got the promotion. But I promise tomorrow, I will make a new commitment to this blog.

And a rewrite of this writing mantra: Write Edit Submit

I’ve been thinking a bit more about my current Writer’s Mantra:

WRITE  EDIT SUBMIT

write edit submit

WRIT EDIT SUBMIT

Is it in your brain yet?  Say it a few more times.

Here are my latest thoughts:

Writers write
Editors edit
Submissives submit

Only an author does all three.

So you want to be an author?

WRITE EDIT SUBMIT

So an update on my mantra progress:

WRITE – 15,000 words to date on current WIP since beginning of June.

EDIT - with the assistance of the fabulous Writing Body Language & Dialogue Cues workshop with Margie Lawson, I’m whipping Beyond Happily Ever After into shape.

SUBMIT – Cinderella has been sent off to another ball to dance the night away.

I’m on track with my mantra.  How are you doing?